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"Notes" #28

 

Regrets

I was practising a piece of music the other day when a couple of lines in the song really resonated with me.
Regrets I've had a few
But then again too few to mention
I did what I had to do
And saw it through without exemption
I planned each chartered course
Each careful step along the by-way
And more, much more than this
I did it my way

                             "My Way"-Paul Anka


How many of us can really say we did it our way?
 
Yes, I had regrets, lots professionally, but the ones that really stick and hurt the most are those concerning family. (I'll share those with my therapist). So just what would you do differently if you could go back, if you could live your life over - however much time you have left - regret free?

So let's live our lives as if there were no tomorrow! Let's "do" more of what we "want" instead of what we "should"-- can you imagine what your life would be like?

Below is the work of two ladies who were very succinct in what they would do if they had their lives to live over.

                             IF I HAD MY LIFE TO LIVE OVER
A well-known humourist reflects on a serious question
BY ERMA BOMBECK

Someone asked me the other day: If I had my life to live over, would I change anything? I
said no, but then I changed my mind.

If I had my life to live over, I would have waxed less and listened more.
Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy and complaining about the shadow over
my feet, I'd have cherished every minute and realized that the wonder growing inside me was to be my only way in life to assist God in a miracle.
I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained and the sofa
faded.
I would have worried much less about the dirt when lighting the fireplace.
I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather ramble about his youth.
I would have burned the pink candle sculptured like a rose before it melted in storage.
I would have sat on the lawn with my children and never worried about grass stains.
I would have cried and laughed less while watching television and more while watching real
life.
I would have shared more of the responsibility carried by my husband.
I would have gone to bed when I was sick instead of pretending the earth would go into a
holding pattern if I weren't there for a day.
I would never have bought anything just because it was practical, wouldn't soil or was
guaranteed to last a lifetime.
When my child kissed me impetuously I would never have said, "Later. Now go wash for
dinner."
There would have been more I love you's, more I'm sorry's, more I'm listening's.
But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize with gentleness every minute, live it,
exhaust it, and never given that minute back until there was nothing left of it.

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Still Erma but at a different time in her life.


IF I HAD MY LIFE TO LIVE OVER     by Erma Bombeck
                                  (written after she found out she was dying from cancer)

I would have gone to bed when I was sick instead of pretending the earth would go into a holding pattern if I weren't there for the day.

I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage.

I would have talked less and listened more.

I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained, or the sofa faded.

I would have eaten the popcorn in the 'good' living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace.

I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather ramble about his youth.

I would have shared more of the responsibility carried by my husband.

I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day because my hair had just been teased and sprayed.

I would have sat on the lawn with my grass stains.

I would have cried and laughed less while watching television and more while watching life.

I would never have bought anything just because it was practical, wouldn't show soil, or was guaranteed to last a lifetime.

Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I'd have cherished every moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.

When my kids kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, 'Later... Now go get washed up for dinner.' There would have been more 'I love you's.' More 'I'm sorry's.'

But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute, look at it and really see it! Live it and never give it back. STOP SWEATING THE SMALL STUFF!

Don't worry about who doesn't like you, who has more, or who's doing what.
Instead, let's cherish the relationships we have with those who do love us...

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This is what Nadine Satir has to say about regrets and living life over.

                            IF I HAD MY LIFE TO LIVE OVER...

     If I had my life to live over, I'd dare to make more mistakes next time. I'd relax. I'd limber up. I would be sillier than I was this time. I would take fewer things seriously. I would take more chances. I would take more trips. I would climb more mountains and swim more rivers. I would eat more ice cream and less beans. I would perhaps have more actual troubles, but I'd have fewer imaginary ones.
     You see, I am one of those people who live sensibly and sanely, hour after hour, day after day. Oh, I've had my moments, and if I had it to do over again, I'd have more of them. In fact, I'd try to have nothing else. Just moments, one after another, instead of living so many years ahead of each day.   
     I've been one of those persons who never goes anywhere without a thermometer, a hot water bottle, a raincoat and a parachute. If I had it to do over again, I would travel lighter than I have.                     
     If I had my life to live over, I would start barefoot earlier in the spring and I would stay that way later in the fall. I would go to more dances. I would ride more merry-go-rounds. I would pick more daisies.

So what I take from these two wise and iconic women is: don't hold back, find more reasons to "do"...and fewer reasons not to..., live life to the fullest (even in the middle of a Pandemic), no regrets-do it all.
                            

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Reader Response to my rantings on Donald Trump from "Notes" #27

I, too, cannot understand how any reasonably intelligent American could possibly support him unless they are either such die hard republicans that they would vote for a chimpanzee provided it ran under the republican banner, or that they are so "anti-establishment" that they are prepared to look beyond his deficiencies just because he is "different".

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He is a completely self-centred individual who cozies up to dictators because he idolizes them and wishes to replicate their power. His only strategy is to repeat his untruths often enough that people actually begin to believe them.

All he has really done is to diminish the influence of his country, which was once the world leader, and surrendered that position to arch rival, China.

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Hi Dan
Here's Trump's Platform for his second term - if he gets it - for whatever it's worth.
As the saying goes, "The proof of the pudding is in the eating."
Personally, I vote according to the Platform and what it stands for, rather than on the basis of the guy running, whether that's running off at the mouth or just plain running.
If I believe in the same values as the platform announces, I'll vote for that platform and hope and pray that the runner will actually do what is being promised.

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Dan,
Your bit about Donald Trump was perfect! I have been wondering myself why I am so addicted, I mean drawn, to CNN and other coverage of Trump. It is truly fascinating to see his almost cult- like following. Thanks for explaining it so clearly!

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 The American people as a whole are extremely naive, and have, for years, swallowed incredible amounts of bullshit as the truth, only to realize later that they have made a huge mistake. They have amazing untruths sold to them by slick politicians, and devious individuals who are in it for themselves.

 


 

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